I’ve always been a hugeeee “forcer.” In school, in relationships, at work, with extracurriculars….I used to loveee being in control (I actually still do lowkey). I have always been the one to text first, the one to make the first move or approach the person making eyes at me at the bar. I’ve always been the one to ask for help after class or lead the group-project. I’ve always been the one to reapply to a college like twice and then protest my declined admission three times, email every single staff member in the journalism department at a college; and the dean of admissions, until they accepted me (yes, this really did happen).
I’ve just always been such a FORCER! Like, seriously. Even when I began my career in yoga teaching and spiritual life coaching, there was a whole lot of forcing at the beginning (i.e., signing up for the yoga teacher training program, finding money for it, etc.).
What I’ve learned recently is, however, that forcing just about anything never really gives you the results you actually want.
All of those men I approached first at the bar? THEY SUCKED! They were horrible matches for me. We had 0 in common besides physical attraction, and no matter how much we got to know one another, I could never stay with them. Why? Because whenever I’d shut off my “force” (OK, I need to come up with better words for these things….) the spark would dismantle. There would be nothing left. I would end up caving in after 1 whole day without hearing from them (or maybe even an hour) and text them first to make place to FORCE hanging out.
That career field I forced myself into? I HATED for the four years I worked in it. The work I produced in it wasn’t anywhere near my fullest potential (because it was forced) and I drove myself into the ground quite literally when the force and stress manifested itself as a fainting spell that landed me with a concussion which prompted this whole holistic-health-version-of-Jess-I-am-today.
And so, here we are.
Attempting to take notes diligently like the amazing bright-eyed, bushy-tailed straight A journalism student who has no desire to work in journalism anymore; for her online class, spending a whole hour trying to get her computer screen to load.
“Wow,” I thought to myself “this sucks.”
It wasn’t until literally a whole hour, 60 minutes of my precious Friday afternoon, passed when I thought: Hm...what if I tried FLOWING instead of FORCING?!
This thinking was what led me here, to this post.
So often we force things that aren’t meant for us.
Because we’re told that in order to have what we truly want in life, in order to accomplish goals or build empires or become millionaires, we must devote our whole life to suffering. To forcing. To grinding.
And when an obstacle arises, we’re told that’s part of the plan.
BUT what if there’s a road with less stress, less obstacles, less “suffering?”
This my friends, is the road less traveled. This, is FLOWING.
Flowing is scary AF for a lot of us. Flowing requires diligence in our own relaxation. Flowing requires going inwards and embarking on a journey of self-discovery, and elevating our own vibration so that we ATTRACT what we actually want instead of forcing what we don’t want.
I know, you’re probably thinking...what the actual fuck is this woman saying right now, and what the heck is a vibration?
Trust me, I used to think the same way as you.
Physics 101 (thanks to our good friend Newton and his laws) states that not only can matter not be created nor destroyed, all matter holds and transfers energy. This energy can be measured via frequency, with the unit of Hertz (Hz) (Believe it or not I was a biology major my freshman year of college...KNEW it would be useful someday!).
And so we, as humans, consist of matter, which emits and absorbs energy.
Now, think about the Law of Attraction, something manifestation experts such as Abraham Hicks swear by. The Law of Attraction suggests that like attracts like, and our thoughts shape our reality. Why? Because our thoughts contain energy, which emits a frequency, that the Universe responds to with a similar frequency. AKA according to the Law of Attraction, when you think life is horrible, it will be horrible.
So, if everything is energy which carries a vibration, and like attracts like vibrations of similar frequency are drawn together, then your thoughts control your reality. And if you can control your thoughts, you have the ability to control your vibration, which means you have the ability to control your life.
Instead of thinking “WOW THE WORLD HATES ME!” “I’m going to fail this class because my computer isn't working,” “I’m wasting my time,” or whatever it is you think when your computer gives you technical problems: try FLOWING instead of forcing.
Flowing dismantles negative thoughts and stressful vibrations from your aura, attracting what you really want instead… like a burst of creativity and the most free-flowing blog post/content piece/writing you’ve created in a longggg time.
And just remember, life’s too short to take it so seriously. And in contrast to the entire universe of beings (humans, animals, plants, stars) you are really quite literally a minuscule component, not only that, but this exact moment will probably mean nothing to you in 20 years. And if it does, let me know.